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New Musings
Trusting the Twisty Turns
 Recently I accepted my first j-o-b outside of the home and hearth in twelve years. It was not an easy decision. Part of me (the hard-driving Capricorn part) felt like a failure: my writing had failed to sustain me as I had hoped it would from the moment I believed I could actually make it as an author. Afterall, The Wicca Cookbook sold out of it's first printing in three months and soon afterwards Hollywood called and I was off starring in a cooking pilot called The Cauldron for the SCI-Fi station. Then came a string of books - seven in all, with contributions in three others.
What with my debut novel, Rogelia's House of Magic, being released very soon, I wanted to hold on a bit longer. But I have chosen the road of private school for my boys - a place that has a nasty knack for raising tuition every year - and it was time for this faery put her feet on the ground - if only for a moment.
I was scared that the flourescent walls would suck away my life force. That the people at work would be so mundane to turn my brain to mush. That the time away from home would extract from me the very energy I needed to be creative.
I have come to discover that the resistance was actually more draining than the actual job. Hmmm. Didn't see that coming. I not only found a job where I can write about interesting things, I have found a boss whom I knew the last time I walked into an office. She has crystals in her jewelry and on her shelves. She has bought many of my books and is proud of my accomplishments rather than jealous. And once I finish my Spanish class, I will have enough time, energy, and creativity to get cracking on that woman's novel for Simon & Schuster.
Interestingly, the very institution for which I now work, Chapman University, has a guiding spirit who also embraces the very things upon which I find most dear. As put forth by President Jim Doti: '“Truth” also refers to values such as honesty, integrity and courage that form the core of one’s moral development, and to what our university’s guiding spirit, Dr. Albert Schweitzer, called “reverence for life.”'
A reverence for life is the foundation of my life's work no matter whether four walls or four trees or four directions surround and sustain me, whether I'm making dinner, hosting a ritual or booksigning, meeting with friends, whatever. My very first award in life was "Most Enthusiastic" on the Sunshine Girls softball team. (the 70's had great team names!!) Despite other accomplishments, this first recognition has long been my favorite because enthusiastic translates "en-theo" to be "in God" - meaning "in or with God," i.e., feeling the life force within. The reverence often becomes revelry in my life. This attitude of bursting joy can be found anywhere.
I am grateful for trusting and taking this latest leap of faith. Hopefully I will remember this latest fall into grace when I question the Universe and it's twisty turns.
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